Reflect, refocus, reset: a coaching approach to year-end review

Year-end reviews — the ones we do for ourselves, not the ones HR runs — tend to fall into one of three traps. They're too short and turn into a quick gratitude list. They're too rushed and turn into next year's goals before this year has been digested. Or they're too focused on what got done, and miss the more useful question: who did I become, doing it?

In coaching, executive coaching especially, December is when we slow down on purpose. The work we do in this month tends to shape how the next year actually goes.

Reflect — what was the year, really?

Start with the simplest possible prompt: what happened? Don't grade it yet. Don't compare it to your January plans. Just list, honestly, the events of the year — the work moves, the personal moves, the things you started and the things you stopped, the surprises in both directions.

Then ask: which of these did I make happen, and which happened to me? The list is often more lopsided than expected. Useful information.

Refocus — what mattered, on reflection?

The point of a coaching-style review isn't to admire the year. It's to refocus on what genuinely mattered — and notice the gap between what you said mattered in January and what your time, attention and energy actually went to.

Three questions worth answering:

• Which weeks of the year, if I could replay them, would I want to keep?
• Which were the conversations that changed something?
• What did I quietly learn that I haven't told anyone yet?

The third question is the most underrated. Most senior people end the year holding a small armful of new understanding they haven't yet articulated. The articulation is the leverage.

Reset — what shape do I want next year to have?

Resist the temptation to make a list of goals. The goals will look like the goals you made last year, and they'll have roughly the same fate.

Instead, decide on a shape. Three things, no more:

• One thing you'll do more of, because doing it makes you better at the rest.
• One thing you'll do less of, because doing it has cost you more than it returned.
• One thing you'll start, smaller than you think it should be, sooner than you'd planned.

That's the work. Hold it lightly. Adjust quarterly.

If a calm thinking hour at year-end sounds like the right gift to give your future self, book a free 45-minute call.